Another tale of vacation envy and knitting failure

Hi everyone,

Yep, I'm still here. Been working and knitting like a dog and (quite frankly) haven't touched the home computer's keyboard in the better part of a month. Guiltily, I'll admit that I've had the makings for a couple of blog posts sitting in draft form on my phone, but haven't gained the gumption to post them because I knew I didn't have the time (or energy) to link in the photos and websites that I thought would make entertaining reading. If you've stuck with me for this long -- Thank you!

Anyways, I'll rant about the book club's latest book and my current knitting failure. For June (we're skipping a meeting for May), we're reading "The Leisure Seeker" by Michael Zadoorian. It's a pretty good book so far, but it's making me depressed already in reading it. I can't help but compare the adventure road trip that the two main characters are on to the road trip that Chuck and I are hoping to take this coming July in New Mexico and hope that we have as good a time as those described as part of the narrator's memories with her husband. I'm hoping that I won't be sorely disappointed if we don't have a vacation as memory filled as those she describes. I hope I'm not setting myself up to completely fail on a vacation by expecting everything to be perfect, wonderful, and great. I expect to blog from New Mexico, so stay tuned for that...but, really, the question we should all be asking is why am I'm comparing my real, yet-to-be-had vacation to that of a fictional senior couple?!?


So, I completely suck at knitting. Sure, disagree with me if you dare, but case in point: I've been working on a cotton summer sweater for the past few weeks. I made it thru the front, back, and one sleeve before noticing that the trim on the two pieces of the sweater body were not the same. Really....what the hell is going on here?!?


Frankly, I was getting pretty bored with the 15 cm or so of plain old stockinette knitting and couldn't wait for that part to be done. And I was bored with it with the first piece....It just so happened that I was ready to work on the second piece a couple of weekends ago, when there happened to be a Doctor Who marathon on the BBC America channel. My house happened to be clean already, so I felt pretty justified in planting my butt permanently on the couch to work on my knitting and get caught up on David Tennant's last season as the Doctor....Well, I was so caught up in watching the show, that I totally put on a stockinette border onto the bottom of the second body piece of the sweater. I spent this past weekend knitting a new border, grafting that piece on, and tearing off the old piece. It wasn't pretty while I was working on it, but now that it's done and over with, a regular person would be none to wiser (though I'm positive that my knitting friends would immediately be able to tell).

I'm happy to say all of the pieces of this sweater are ready for the blocking board and I'll be able to get to that either Thursday or Friday....So, now I'm left with working on my Guild exchange project (which is looking pretty fantastic -- so I'm waiting for the big disappointing piece to come along and put the brakes on the whole project) as well as a pair of socks that are depressing to work on since they're pretty boring. I'll post pictures of both soon enough.

Sorry for such a crappy, disconnected, rambling update. I'm a bit tipsy from a "meet and greet" I did earlier this evening with some visiting colleagues and I'm ready to plop down with my projects, watch "Justified", then head to bed. [Seriously, folks, if you haven't seen this show yet, you're really missing out. I think that Raylan is joining the ranks of Joe Dubois and Mick St. John as my TV hunny buns. (Yes, feel bad for Chuck who gets to sit right next to me and play the role of "chopped liver" while I swoon. And, yes, Jim is officially off the list ever since the ludicrous Sam/Jim storyline was introduced....sorry.)]

The long lost post: "You look like beefcake....You sound like beefcake, so why do you put me to sleep?!?"

I'm talking about you, Sam Worthington! A draft of this post has been sitting on my blog for the past few weeks, but I just haven't had the muster to sit down and finish writing it until today; and even now, it's a little bit of forced writing as I'm hanging out at Beaner's waiting to meet with someone to go over planning for Sylvain's Troop's summer camp outing. So, have some unexpected down time at the moment....

I hate to say it, but there's just something about you that is my personal Lunesta....Up until a couple of weeks ago, I had been very happy to share my thoughts on Avatar, despite having fallen asleep twice (twice!) while sitting in a packed 3-D showing. [Yes, snoring included....or so I'm told]. I seemed to lose consciousness each time during scenes in which you were delivering long pieces of dialog (or so I'm told).

Being willing to write that business off to just shitty writing, I was one of the few folks actually eager to see you in Clash of the Titans. I can confidently say that I walked into the theater fully awake to the 2-D (not packed) show with Sylvain; but somewhere towards the middle of the movie, Sylvain realized that he was losing me and delivered a sharp elbow into my arm. I was truly glad to have my knitting with me that evening because out of my purse it came and it kept me awake until the end of the movie. Sure, Liam Neeson and Ralph Fiennes could've helped in keeping me invested in watching, but I was having a hard time getting past a couple of things: the bright light and haloed shimmer around Liam's Zeus reminded me of soap opera-esque soft focus scenes, so I was a little disappointed that Hera wasn't around to do any bitchy Telemundo-like hair pulling and eye-clawing over Zeus' baby-daddy ways; also, I really wished I hadn't read any reviews going into it because all I could do was nod in agreement to all of the critics who wondered if anyone told Ralph that he wasn't on the Harry Potter set anymore, so he didn't need to channel his Voldemort persona so closely to play Hades.

Anyways, I digress.....Returning home, I started to wonder why I was having a hard time staying awake during those two films in particular. I've seen plenty of movies and even started going to attend the live MET performances being streamed at the theater and those are at least 3 hours long at their shortest. (And in a different language to boot.) The only conclusion I can come to is that you're the common link. I honestly can't remember if I fell asleep to Terminator Salvation also; that was a year ago, after all. I'll need to consult my movie companions for that; though, I doubt that they would've been able to hear any snoring over all of the explosions to have noticed. Hmmmm....Maybe Christian Bale trumped any effect you had on me.

Better luck next time! I still have high hopes for you and haven't written off watching your films like some other actors.

Oh, and for a current action movie that kept me interested the whole time, see Kick Ass.

Kicking ass and taking names

I've spent 90% of my day Saturday being a complete and total bitch -- successfully completely pissing off nearly every person I managed to come in contact with (family, friends, and strangers alike).

Before I share my tale of carnage with you, let's go over more pleasant matters first.

Returned item!
The Gremlins complied with my heart-felt note and returned one of the items I had been missing -- the library book that I had paid for. So, as soon as I'm done reading this month's book club book, I'm reading the returned book straight away so that I can return it to where it belongs and get my money back.

The knitting

I've been knitting pretty steadily this past month, though don't have a whole lot to show for it. Earlier this month, I attended the Knitter's Guild retreat and managed to leave with my projects less completed than I arrived with, having torn down to nothing the Estes vest I had been working on. As you may recall, the size was just wrong for me; during the retreat, I drug it out of its bag and held it up for scrutiny and advice. Basically, not only had I knit the wrong size, but my gauge was off by enough to really matter. Once it was torn down to balls of yarn, I had lost my zeal in starting anew and focused on stitching together my squares for the Great American Aran Afghan and working on my pair of Cookie A's Rick socks. By the end of the weekend, I had 4 strips of 5 squares each.

I also spent a weekend this past month leading Sylvain's Boy Scout Troop on a camp-out in northern Kentucky where we searched for fossils both there and in southern Ohio. During the long drives over the course of that weekend, I swatched for a new sweater and was able to complete my Rick socks. I then got my sweater yarn into the most horrendous knot -- one so bad that I think I scarred the two other moms on the trip enough by the sight of it that they're likely to never attempt any sort of fiber art ever....

Anyways, once I returned home and the dust settled, I washed the Rick socks and placed them on the blocking wires only to notice that I am a complete and totally inept knitter. Tell me, please, just how quickly you were able to catch on that the two socks don't match. Sure, the socks are supposed to have the pattern spiraling in different directions; but, really, the two spiraled patterns are not the same. Even looking back at the pattern, I am completely clueless as to how I read the pattern wrong, but there you have it right in front of your eyes...So much for my chart-reading skills!

My neurosis

Okay, so if' you've read this far, you can tell that things haven't really been going my way. Hell, even the post prior to this one would clue you in that I've been wound pretty darned tight lately. So, I was really looking forward to returning to the movie theater on Saturday to see the Met performance of Hamlet. I was pressed for time since I had friends coming over Saturday night to play cards; the past week was horrendously busy, and Chuck and I went to the MSU Museum Wine Tasting benefit on Friday night, so hadn't had any time to really dig in and clean my house. In my infinite wisdom, I set aside Saturday morning to do my chores, thinking that it would all come together in no time. Really, what was I thinking?

In reality, my Saturday morning went like this: woke up at 5 am, cold and laying on the floor of the den with one foot propped up on the couch where Chuck had been sitting with it in his lap, giving me a foot massage because the heels I wore to the wine tasting had been killing me. I totally slept thru the MSU Sweet 16 game; the guys had also fallen asleep on the couch, so the TV was blaring and all of the house lights were on....Wincing, I got up and headed upstairs for "just a couple more hours of rest". Not only was I wide awake at 7 am, but I started to panic that I wouldn't be able to accomplish all of the cleaning I had in mind before needing to leave for the show. So, unfortunately for Chuck and Sylvain (and after much angst), I had them up and doing chores also by 8 am....

Needless to say, we made it to a point where I was moderately satisfied with the condition of the house; at least, satisfied enough to have folks over for cards. Chuck and Sylvain weren't at all interested in the opera and Mark had quite a few things going-on on his Saturday schedule, so I attended the show alone -- which was fine; at least, if I wasn't enjoying the performance, I had the opportunity to leave and not feel like I was depriving anyone. Well, let's just say that if you happened to be out on Saturday and were in places that were busy, yet had a pleasant time, then you really owe me a "thanks" because every possible asshole in the Greater Lansing area attended the same opera show as me and weren't wherever you were bugging you. [Which, by the way, really makes me wonder about where I rank on the asshole spectra considering the company I was in...I'm sure I'm up there.] Sure, there were probably some very nice, normal folks in attendance at the show too. We all just had to suffer thru the same crap from some prime class-act folks.

First off, the show was the busiest Met streaming that I've attended yet, so was very happy to see that. But yet.....To the left of me, sat an older woman who brought her own snacks. Normally, I could truly care less if folks do that; but she proceeded to dig thru her plastic shopping bag of goodies the entire time. I was starting to believe that she must've brought a full course meal or something because that bag rustled constantly, except (ironically) during the intermission. To the right of me, sat another older woman who was enjoying popcorn (which is also fine; I was even doing that), but who kept dropping popcorn on the ground, then crunching it underfoot. I'm not talking about an "oops, that's where that went" kind of crunching; it was more of squeaking popcorn kernels underfoot as they were being rolled back and forth. During the intermission, she left her seat, so I walked over to where she was sitting and kicked the mound of kernels out from under her seat onto the floor at the base of the seat in front of her. (Take that!)

Then, two jackass children giggled and ran into the theater during the opera, yelling "What up, dog!" (Yes, they are children and, yes, I called them jackasses. Hey! Didn't I warn you at the beginning of this whole mess that I spent Saturday being a complete and total bitch?) They proceeded to run up the stairs on one side of the stadium seating; turned to look at the screen and saw that it was an opera, then ran back out of the theater. They were gone for about two minutes, then ran back in and back up the stairs, and sat right in my row. Once seated, they proceeded to talk. Flabbergasted, I stopped paying attention to the show and gave them my full-on "I'm about to leap out of this seat and throttle you" glare. If Ms. Popcorn Cruncher wasn't sitting between us, I would've gone over to their seats and chased them out. One of the kids looked over at me, shuddered, grabbed her friend's arm and motioned to leave. They did not return.

In addition, and I'm somewhat sad to say it, there was the person who arrived 25 minutes late and was riding an amigo. Yes, folks, you can tell that I've hit rock bottom when I've turned to complaining about a person in a motorized cart. So, not only did this person arrive in the theater after the show had started, but had arrived in the dark and was completely clueless as to how to park their cart so that they were comfortable and could see the show. After several tries in the dark, they couldn't get their cart parked correctly (or something). [Mind you that each time they backed the cart up, there was beeping involved.] Once they reached the peak of their frustration, they decided that turning on their headlights would really help improve their situation. Unfortunately for me, they turned the headlight on when it was angled right into the section I was sitting in. There really isn't anything more pleasant than having your night vision completely glared out by an unexpected light. Trust me on that one. Once they had their light to help them, they had their cart parked after three more back and forth maneuvers (accompanied by, yes, more beeping).

Sitting in my seat, silently seething with my eyes in pain, I truly contemplated leaving the show during intermission; not because I wasn't enjoying the opera itself, but because I could not believe the stroke of luck I was having with the crowd I was sitting with. The only people missing were the jerks who bring laser pointers to the theater and idiots who use their cell phones during the show. They must've been in the theater next door...the one that had lots of loud explosions....

At any rate, my last gripe comes courtesy of the theater itself. They didn't raise the lights during the intermission, which was I guess okay; but they didn't turn them on again when the opera was over. There's nothing like being in a dark theater full of elderly people who are having a hard time locating their belongings. I managed to make my way out and head straight to the main desk to complain. It was too bad that the manager that knows me wasn't there....I'm still contemplating on calling to talk to him at some point this week about that. I mean, having folks exit out of a dark theater is a safety issue after all....

So, I guess I'll stop here. I have plenty more to complain about related to the errands I ran after the opera and before the card playing. But I'll spare you and leave you with this: cards were played, wine was drunk, snacks were enjoyed, and I got to sleep in on Sunday (meaning that the rest of the house was able to sleep in too); so Sunday ended up being all-in-all pretty good day.....

An open letter to all Gremlins residing in Chez Moi

Dear Gremlins,

Okay, uncle already! Over the past several weeks, you've left a swath of discord in my life that has turned the order I typically enjoy on its head.

I've had enough of you taking my belongings and would sincerely appreciate the return of the following items:

- the CADL book Cahokia; sure, I've paid for its replacement already, but I really am still interested in finishing it;

- the sapphire heart ring that Chuck bought for me; it has sentimental value to me and I'd really like it back;

- the fun-loving attitude my son used to have; because the sour-puss that has taken its place is making dealing with a teenager at times a real drag;

- and, finally, my time; I've finished a couple of projects and started a couple of projects, but have no time to take adequate photos nor blog about them, my house is ready for spring cleaning, and I'm behind in my book club reading.

Any questions? Thank you in advance for your cooperation.

Sincerely,

geoknitter

Maybe a little bit of research is in order

It's Sunday night. I'm sitting pretty comfortably with my tax papers stacked next to the computer, the NBC pre-show for the Olympic closing ceremony playing on the TV (which, I might add, is giving Chuck the fits; "This is such schlock! I can't believe they're making us watch this sappy footage; can't they just replay the event without the stupid commentary?!?"), my project bag is full of yarn for my next project, and a glass of red wine is at hand. All of the worries of my last entry have been alleviated. Amy received her baby blanket and my Ravelympics wrap is drying on the blocking board. I was able to complete both in good time, but if needed to voice complaints about both projects....

I ended up needing to cut Amy's baby blanket a few rounds short because I just plain ran out of time working with it. I wanted to give it a wash and lay it flat before giving it to her -- and ended up staying up until 4:30 Saturday morning just to do so. Yes, 4:30 am. This made Saturday suck rocks because I still got up at 7:30 to take Sylvain to his bus for his last ski trip of the season and to attend my 8:30 fitness class. After class, I stopped at the office to check on some samples I had starting running on Friday morning and to do just an hours' worth of e-mail and messages. Afterwards, I went on the hunt for the perfect box for the blanket. Originally, I had wanted to use a cute hat box that I had seen at Meijer previously. Of course, I found that they were no longer available, so I took a quick trip over to Hobby Lobby and found an even cuter box.

As for the blanket itself: even though this is the fourth or fifth time I worked this pattern, I made sure to correct something that had been nagging me on the previous blankets. For the attached I-cord trim, I cut the working yarn, used a crochet cast on (chained 7 or so stitches using a waste yarn, casted on 3 stitches into three of the center chains, allowing extra chain stitches to hang on either side) to being the I-cord. This provided me a very neat corner that I was able to Kitchener shut. Of course, I didn't think to take pictures of this. Maybe taking good photos will be the part I'll change for the next blanket, so somebody, hurry up and have a baby already. [Acutally.....maybe I'll have one come your way, Carrie, if I knew your due date....] The finished dimensions on this blanket ended up being 32" x 32". As for the yarn, it was a good one -- no issues with splitting or odd breaks in the skein. Overall, it was a pretty solid superwash wool. My only complaint is that the color changes were very short (1" to 1.5" long), giving the blanket a look that reminds me of those microwave cakes from the late-80s (you know, those cakes that came with their own little microwavable trays -- the "confetti" version). [If anyone remembers this particular food atrocity, please let me know -- it's killing me to recall the company and brand name of this product and my on-line searches are coming up empty.]

One thing that Amy and Andy did ask was what made the wool washable. I was at a complete and total loss as to really what to say and just replied that it was all in the way that the yarn was processed, forgetting that they are a very conscientious couple when it comes to chemical and environmental issues. Amazingly, it's never really occurred to me before to wonder what was really involved in making a wool washable, so I'm going to make it a point to find out and at least let them know. I'd hate to think that anything within the wool used to make this blanket would expose their baby to anything harmful. Usually when selecting a superwash wool for a gifted item, I'm concerned with making sure that the end product is as maintenance-free for the recipient as possible. Unless the recipient has a true appreciation for wool, they're not willing or understanding enough to care for the item in a way so that it doesn't shrink or felt (or both). Any suggestions from bloggerville on where to start in my fact-finding mission?

As for the Ravelympics Petals Wrap: my biggest complaint is that I'm not too sure about the crochet border. It looks even and the numbers worked out with what the pattern suggested as for stitch spacing, but on the mat, it just looks a little pulled in certain sections. If I'm really not happy with it, I just might end up ripping out the border and fixing it (really, it wasn't hard to do -- just a SC and CH1 with a bead inserted every 5th chain or so). I have a nice sized hank of the yarn left and a ton of beads. In fact, I have so many beads left over that I wondered if I did the edging incorrectly, but after re-reading the directions, found that I was right and there's just a lot of extra. If I were selling this kit, I would decrease the number of beads by 3/4, but that's just me. Maybe folks are using the beads within the pattern, which would be really neat, but involve more forward planning than I allowed myself for this project....

Well, I'm off to complete my taxes (yay, money!), work out the details with Chuck on our summer Southwestern USA extravaganza vacation, and get to knitting.....